(to the tune of Jingle Bells of course!)
Tumbling through the door, slurred speech all could say,
Begging for hippy mercy, will he save the day?
Drink some of this water, try not to throw up there
So much for an early night, what’s that in your hair? Ho Ho Ho
Dropped my status from Total C*nt(tm) to simply c*nt after doing a spot of nursing for Ealing’s famous “chucker” Sickly-Sheila. Obviously she’d imbibed a little too much of the Devil’s Draught after work tonight. Grant, her usual care-taker, was busy with his own top-and-tails type tipple trying and “The Others” were nowhere to be seen. Eeek! I don’t remember ever being sober around drunklings! What a horrible experience! ๐
All this was after becoming homicidal whilst trying to open the fscking front door! Arrrgh! Next time, I’m charging the fscking thing down! You are official on my hit-list, door!
I’m only mentioning this to make Sheila feel real guilty when she sobers up. This should be enough to regain my status as a Total C*nt(tm) bwahahahaa ๐
In much more interesting news..
FRANZ FERDINAND TOMORROW NIGHT!!
FRANZ FERDINAND TOMORROW NIGHT!!
FRANZ FERDINAND TOMORROW NIGHT!!
(actually TONIGHT in about 5min)
that is just sooo grose
Thanks! I’d like to say I try hard but that’d be a lie – grossness comes so naturally to me.. ๐
Is that your fancy European way of saying you’re big?
Ha ha… I remember other people combing the vomit out of your hair – a friend in need is a friend in deed! So, you’ve found a compatriot worthy of being called The Devil’s Draught? It better be a mutable party starter and destroyer all in one like my old brew, otherwise I’ll be sorely disappointed…
Tam:
I’m confuzzed! If it makes you feel better – "I’m big" (and confuzzed).
Actually, Sheila is making me feel very guilty for going to see Fat Boy Slim instead of going to her birthday party, so I need to make her feel guilty back.
Ant:
No, there is no worthy opponent to the DD. I should not have used those words in reference to Any Old Beer(tm). I will not change it though as a homage to the brew to kill all brews. ๐
I remember quite a few occasions where Vomit Combing was required. Those were the daze! ๐
gross… big… forget it
Oh, right, I get it. ha ha
This job seems to have caused my brains to leak out of my head.
Beautiful
We’re full swing at Ballet at the moment – Vomit in your hair, grazes on your skin and hangovers don’t go too well on stage, so I’m staying away from Parties and bikes until after the last performance Saturday night.
But yes, Mud-Man, I do recall a few occasions which you had spew in your hair… Mmmmm… Yuk.
Don’t make me recount some of your "magic moments" ๐