Yes, after much messing around, the GT has landed!

I called Jetta and they told me to contact Heathrow Handling, who do the customs clearance stuff. Bike was delayed for a day (so arrived 20th).

Wrote down the directions from Heathrow to Ealing. I was pretty sure I’d packed too much stuff in the two boxes to be able to ride back, but ‘just in case’.

Paid 4 quid for the off-peak Zone 4,5,6? daily ticket which would get me out to Heathrow, catching Picadilly line train from South Ealing station.

Due to maintenance on Terminal 4 I had to catch a bus from Hatton Cross station. Was told by Heathrow Handling guy to wait at the H23 stop. Of course I was at the WRONG H23 stop and moved to the correct one after speaking to a driver. 15min wait and off to the cargo terminal.

I got off the bus when everyone else did and followed them to a gate. Everyone seemed to be swiping cards to go through. I’m thinking “what the fsck?” and speak to the security guards on the gate. “No no no.. you have to go back to the lights and around to the cargo areas”. Off I trundle, grumbling about the stupid BA cargo terminal and the food place where I left the bus..

A kay or so later I was pretty sure I was at the right place, many airlines and trucks with freight and shit everywhere. I wandered.. I couldn’t see any Heathrow Handling so I went into a random office. Waited. No one was gonna serve me any time this century and I’m impatient so I left. Spotted a dude in a truck and asked him about Heathrow Handling.

“Do you mean Heathrow Cargo Handling?”

“Um.. I guess that’s them.. it’s not what the guy called them.”

“See that HCH sign over there – that’s them”

HC fscking H! Why didn’t you say HCH on the phone you twat! Heathrow Handling doesn’t look anything like HCH when writing on the side of a building!! Dick.

I go into the HCH office and show them my Airwaybill number. “Oh, we don’t do those. Menzies handles Thai Air cargo”. Geez.. so HCH wasn’t even the right company!

Go to Menzies office and I’m told to go around the back to the other office. Other office is unattended so I use the phone there to call the numbered specified. “I haven’t worked here long, I’m not sure who’s supposed to be there. Come back to the front office”. I go back to the front office and show them my Jetta docket. The guy calls and sends me back to the back office. I go back to the back office and wait for a couple of other Aussies to be processed, then it’s my turn..

“That’ll be 56.06UKP”. I sigh, thinking I could buy a whole new bike for what it’s now cost me to ship the GT over. Pay and receive a docket. “Head over to door 7.”

I head over to door 7 and wait for the same Aussies to get some suitcases. Another couple of people load vans while I wait. Guy driving the forklift gets my docket and hoons off. Comes back with my bike box and other box of goodies. I’m pretty happy they look intact.. well except for the skewer poking through. The skewer was bent. It works but I’ll need a new one.

I unpack the smaller box and try to fit everything into the Crumpler. “Holy crap! That was a good estimation!” It actually all fits, mind you, with straps fully undone and only JUST..

While contemplating the kay or so back to the bus stop, a guy in a van rocks up. I ask him if he’s going near Hatton Cross and if he’d mind loading the bike in. He’s cool with that! YES!

I help him load his van and jump in. On the way I find out he carries RADIOACTIVE material and EXPLOSIVES. I’m laughing. He’s cool. Gets 400 quid for a radioactive shipment as opposed to 200 quid for non-dangerous items. You need to go to college to get the license for radioactive stuff but anyone can carry explosives. I ask and he tells me he’s only had one load of explosives shift.. uh huh.. but that was because the guy he was picking up from insisted the load was strapped down under the shrinkwrap when, in fact, it was not. Luckily, detonators are carried separately to the funky shit that Arnie/Stallone straps to tanks, etc..

I should just point out that even though they weren’t the most efficient, everyone I dealt with was really nice and I was very thankful to them whenever I progressed 🙂

Jumped on the train with my bike and bag and headed home. Carrying the bike from the station to home was hell. It’s been two days and my arms are still fucked from doing it!! I had to stop quite a few times so that my arms/fingers didn’t fall off.. bloody hell.. why didn’t I use a lighter bike?!?!

The bike made it home and I rested. When my fingers started working again, I put the bike together. It actually worked! I will have to replace the skewer though..

Went for a ride WITHOUT A HELMET, LEGALLY!!!!! hahahaha

It was fucking awesome to ride again!!!!

I neeed more air in my tyres than my little Blackburn could deliver so I pulled into a servo and used the pump..

“What the hell!?!?” I yelped. The frickin’ tyres were DEFLATING on the pump!!

I tried again and then looked at the pump box thingo.. 10p for 3mins! Fsck me! Mick wasn’t wrong about air not being free!!!

I dive into my pocket and throw in a 10p coin.. “Ahhhh there we go!”. The nozzle is dodgy (just like home) but I manage to get about 50psi in each tyre.

Off I hooned.. free to dodge traffic helmet-less to my hearts content!! WOOOOOO HOOOOOOO!!!!

I don’t know where I went but it was fun. Drivers were so cool. I’m sure I’ll find out they’re not so cool the more I ride but for now – I’m impressed. I even watched a door crack open in my path. I was on the brakes but the door didn’t go any further. I rode by and looked in – the passenger was actually looking at me!!! I waved thanks at her and continued on like a psycho, not sure if I should be a tourist or if I should be doing sprint drills.. 🙂

I passed shitloads more cars here than I do back home.. and most riders will agree.. it feels GOOD! 😀

I still have to research the rules about riding in bus lanes.. not sure about that one..