I was riding back from my LBS. I get tooted from behind. Not a friendly toot but one of those “I’m a driver here me roar” toots from some moron.

I ride on, noting their rego as they turn. Another thing I note is the fact that they just turned into the carpark area behind the shops.

“Oh goody”, I think as I ride further up the street and do a u-turn, sure that I’ll soon be able to kick the mirrors off their Commodore (Note: I wouldn’t actually do that for a toot but I wanted them to know I could).

Sure as shit, the female driver and male passenger are standing at their car – guess they thought I might come back 🙂

“You should be careful who you toot your horn at”, I mention casually, at the same time, glaring like I want to smear their blood over their car.

“You were in the middle of the road”, the slapper replies.

“One, I was not in the middle of the road and two, it doesn’t matter if I was, I’m ALLOWED to be there – you were behind me, you have to wait.”

“He’s right”, says the male passenger.

“I’ve said my bit, now, take care.” I say, calm as fsck, like a serial killer.

With any luck they might not be so willing to hassle the next cyclist they see fearing ‘carpark vengeance’.