What do you do when you get home with 290k (181mi) on your trip distance display?

Say “hi” to your girl, grab a handful of sugary treats and head back outside to ride around until the bastard clock ticks over 300k (180mi) of course!!

Yes, my first ever 300k ride (I consider it one ride if it’s within 24hrs in the one pair of knicks) and it was done fixed on a bike I rarely ride, mostly at night, carrying a full bag!

I was wrecked, with a dangerously sore backside, although I’m feeling quite okay now that I’ve eaten everything in sight.. until I try to stand up that is 🙂

Last night I rode the Soma (with new 45×17, 69.6GI gearing versus last year’s 42×15, 73.6GI) into London Fields for the start of Dunwich Dynamo 16. Meeting the forum bunch we imbibed pre-ride drinks and talked the usual crap. Weather was looking good. Riders seemed to be mostly the same as last year, even with 3000 londonfgss.com members. Soft. Roberto was setting a standard even Cipo would fail to meet.. silver skinsuit with aero helmet and yellow overshoes! Nice one!

We set out later than last year (giving us loads of flashing red lights to chase) and kept the pace easy. Since we’d left later, there wasn’t the massive bunches this time which made sticking together a lot easier. I did the majority of the riding with someone I knew and only now and then went away alone. This helped with pacing, unlike my Polar HRM which seems to be dying on me – for the 2nd year running!

The weather was LOADS nicer this year, it was much lighter with the full moon actually visible and we saw the famous roadside candles left by a leading rider. We got a tiny bit of rain entering Lavenham. Lavenham also happened to be the location of the feed station (last year’s place was getting renovated) and it had stopped by the time we left so, no problemo!

What’s with the roads being SOOOO much nicer east than the goat tracks they have scattered around the Chilterns out west?? I thought richies lived out west? I guess they all own BMW X5’s so they don’t need to worry about dodgy road surfaces. Anyway, without the never-ending rain of last year I noticed the sweet roads out east – pity about all the knobs driving on them. Some of the people leaving pubs were a laugh though. 🙂

Bit of a rest at the feed station, some coffees and a soup and we eventually gathered enough steam to move out.

I spotted a hedgehog crossing the road. I think it’s the first one I’ve seen that wasn’t road kill. Stopped in front of it to stop it being hit while the lads tapped the little blighter until he ran away. Animal Welfare job done.

“Most Agressive Rider” award goes to Stompy and Sam:

Stompy really suffered last year and yet he exhibited top HTFU properties and came back for more, and this year he was really moving along. Top stuff.

Sam, with next to no training, joined me for the ride back to Ipswich. He was on 250k+ when I left him at Liverpool St. Well done mate! Proper ‘ard! 🙂

Thanks everyone for smiling, riding with me, putting up with me and making the whole thing fun for the second year. Nice to meet forumers Jacqui and Moose at various points during the ride. I also look forward to hearing about the stag do that started with DD16.. cough up you guys..

This is before I set off with Sam to add another 80k to the day.. :S

My lame phone pics of Dunwich Dynamo 16 here.

Tommy’s much funkier Dunwich photos.

DanDNA’s Dunwich photoset

Corny’s Dynamo photoset

LondonFGSS.com Dunwich Dynamo thread

Steve’s Dunwich Dynamo 2008 ITV video

Stompy’s Dunwich Dynamo 2008 report can be found here.

RPM’s Dunwich Dynamo 2008 report can be found on Rollapaluza here.

Ed’s pic of the “Fixed gear maniacs” at the start last year.

www.southwarkcyclists.org.uk – faq

www.londonschoolofcycling.co.uk – route

Finally Prav visited and took my cranks. Gone are the evil Campagnolo Athena road cranks. Now the Soma has received more blackness in the form of FSA Vigorelli track cranks. With the new 45T up front I’ve swapped out the 3/32 16T cog with a black Condor 17T one. Now I need a new chain. I think these will need testing before Dunwich but I’m not sure if I have time. I don’t really want to be looking for an ISIS BB tool and wrench at 3am in the middle of nowhere..

Fri 27th – Day 2

I was feeling good for the first proper racing day. Today we had GC and Sprint sections to ride as well as more KOM points to contest. The first GC section was 33k long and started after about 10k. Harsh. For me, hanging on was all I was concerned with.

Ate breakfast quickly (fried stuff and croissants, coffee) and chatted with Marcel about whether or not we should even start in Group 1. “Yes, let’s see how we go” was the conclusion.

We had something like 2 hours to wait at the start point where we’d left our bikes before our actual start time of 10am. This proved useful to me as I’d forgotten the 1mm spacer for my cassette. Stupid wheel changes! Mavic Ksyrium needs a 2mm spacer, Powertap needs a 1mm spacer if it’s a 10spd cassette but no spacer if it’s a 9spd cassette. I’d taken off the Mavic 2mm spacer but forgot to put the 1mm spacer on (I was using my 10spd 12-23 DA cassette). Since the Powertap freehub is made of cheese, the cassette had dug in and I didn’t even notice the spacer missing until I hit a bump on Day 1 and something started rattling. Clearly the bump had shaken the sprockets loose.

The two G1 mechanics, Graeme and (I’m sorry, I’ve forgotten your name!) did a great job digging around until they found the necessary spacer. Phew! Sat around and watched the same mechanics do a fork swap in a few minutes.

We finally rolled out easily and I found it amusing the number of people that punctured or had to stop for a leak after only 2k! We turned onto a road (and I use the term “road” very loosely!) next to the canal leading us out of Calais. As we bumped and bounced our way closer to the start of the first GC section the pace went up and up. The bunch was maybe 3 wide as that’s all that would fit on the canal path. Looking at my Powertap data now and I see I was hitting 54.8kph/34mph at the 26min mark, 55.4kph at 29min! This is on the flat. At 18k/34min I’m at 600W and 43.5kph. Then it happens..

The riders in front of me hit their brakes. Thanks. FSCK! Not wanting to have the riders behind me run up my arse I go for the small gap to the right. Unfortunately, the gap isn’t deep enough and I’m forced wide towards the meter-wide grass verge, between the path and canal. This would have been fine except there was a hard edge to the grass divider (picture when a car drives through dirt in the wet it leaves a rut and then the rut dries hard). So, as I’m forced out I clip this rut and flip over. Now, at 43.5kph this could have been nasty, but it was on the grass at this point so I basically rolled along and was fine. Jenny Fay(?) (an Elite Irish racer) was behind me and later told me I crashed like a pro! Haha! I should have told her it’s all the practice I get 😛

Of course, as most people have already heard, this wasn’t the full extent of the crash.. As I rolled over I looked up to see my bike flying over the top of me.. over the top of me and straight into the CANAL! Noooooooooo waaaaaaaaaay!!

I scramble/roll to the edge and all I can see is the front wheel – the rest of the bike has already sunk and is out of sight. Shiiiit! I continue my scramble/roll and grab for the front wheel. The water level is a foot or more below the edge and I’m not able to get the wheel without sliding in. Time for a swim! I slip into the canal and grab the front wheel. It’s deeper than I thought and I can’t actually touch the bottom. So, in my left hand I’m gripping the front wheel and I paddle back to the edge and grab a handful of the grass bank with my right hand.

The water is up to my chest/neck and now I’m basically stuck. I can’t lift the bike over my head, I can’t climb up the bank, I can’t see anything above the bank and I can’t touch the bottom. Um…

“Oi! Some help down here!!!” I yell out, not actually sure if anyone has seen me go in the water. Within maybe 30 seconds I’m greeted with the panic stricken face of one of the French motorbike outriders. “It’s ok, I’m Aussie, I can swim. Take the bike!”. I hand up the bike as much as possible and he grabs it. Then me.. I can’t actually drag myself out of the canal (all that ‘descending ballast’ I carry) because the bank is too high and there’s nothing to grip onto. Another guy from one of the follow cars has appeared and the two blokes drag me out. The moto guy was more worried than me! “Cheers guys!” (plus much swearing at myself) and I’m shaking my bike out and checking it for damage – it’s fine, if a little wet :).

This photo was taken in 2005, when I cycled along the Calais canal path on an mtb at a much reduced pace!

The Group 1 mechanics are on the scene explaining they’ll pace me back to the bunch. I get behind the big van and off we go. Within a couple of minutes I’m doing over 50kph behind the van. Sitting just to the right so they can see me and I can see them. They’re great giving me positive comments like “you’re doing great” and “use a higher gear, it’s easier to manage at this speed” and giving thumbs up and things like this.

I’m behind the van for 20 minutes, averaging over 45kph, before I hit a very tight corner, literally.

“We couldn’t see you to tell you to slow down. We usually use station wagons with a rear window for this.”

“It felt like we were on two wheels going around that!”

“We didn’t see you crash but we certainly heard you. The sound of bike hitting tarmac has quite a recognisable sound.”

I’d gone into a very tight right hander way too fast and just put the bike down trying to make the corner. Hitting the deck at 30kph when I should been doing 15-20kph on what was basically a slippery switch-back. (Insert large amount of angry swearing here). Again, the fantastic Group 1 mechanics came to my rescue and calmed me down. I’d damaged my rear Powertap wheel to some extent (I still don’t really know what was wrong with it – probably just buckled a bit) so they got me a spare (deep and carbon, ooh flashy! :)). Off I set again behind the van, cursing myself a little more. I’d bloodied my elbow and some fingers this time as well as having a nice corked and scratched up right hip – no damage to my Assos knicks though 🙂

Continued behind the van at speed again for a while until we picked up a rider who’d suffered a puncture. I rode on ahead while they sorted him out and drove back up to me. I was pretty tired now and dropped off the back of the van at one point thinking I’d just let them go (with the puncture guy hanging on). They slowed and I got back on. We drove up to a group of 4 riders who must have been dropped from the main bunch. So there was now 6 of us behind the van for a while. Then we came upon some motos who instructed us to pull over. Huh? What’s going on? Turns out, the main peloton had taken a wrong turn! Sitting by the side of the road, eating, drinking, talking about my swimming detour, our little group were now “leading” the race haha 🙂

Regrouping, it was then a matter of hanging on until the lunch stop. At lunch, the questions started and “The Fish” was born.

Unfortunately, on this day mine wasn’t the only incident. One of the other Group 1 riders, Andy D’Agata reportedly hit some diesel on the road and was subsequently hit by one of the motorcycle outriders. He sustained serious head injuries and later died after being airlifted to a hospital in Lille. I didn’t know the full extent of his injuries until the Sunday after arriving in Paris but we did know it was very serious as further racing sections for Group 1 were canceled. I would just like to extend my sincere condolences to the family and friends of Andy.

The rest of the day was very hard work (for me). I’d lost my nerve from the crashes and was hanging out the back, not really interested in things. The bunch was going up hill at quite a clip so I was chasing to get back on and then I’d crest the hills and they’d have knocked 10kph off their speed! Then the lead car would slow the descent. It was quite infuriating (but I can understand it, after Andy’s accident) and I used up loads more energy than I should have if I just stayed mid-bunch. The hills just went up and down forever!

We stopped at the top of one of them (poor Marcel was looking worse than me! I think he needed to eat more) and (sorry I’ve forgotten your name) the Aussie bloke encouraged the bunch to ease up a little going upwards and keep the pace higher on the flat. It did help and by the run into Amiens I was in the bunch and feeling much better. I made a point of passing Stephen Roche on the super nice roads into town 🙂

We left the bikes at the start point and were bussed to our hotel. Des and I roomed again and I spent the evening talking about my ‘swim’ and deciding when I should start the Run leg. 🙂

We had dinner in a nearby restaurant. Steak and pasta I think with wine. Starters were little veg. skewers and and apple cake dessert thing. The diners in the other room were rude buzztards, cheering when they received food. I mean, so it takes a while to get your meal, big deal. I’m a pig and I waited patiently. Can’t take cyclists anywhere! Home to bed, asleep quickly. Day 2 done.

I’ve just been telling people I’m doing what the Pros do:

Frank Schleck falls in pool..

Wed 25th – Registration

Dropped off my bag full of casual clothes, 3 days of cycling clothes and gels, bars, powders. Had dinner at a nearby Zizi’s with the Grupetto crew and some of the girls (Nicky, Meg, Antonia) riding G3/G4?

Up late panicking and sorting out the fitting of race numbers, printing of maps to the start, etc.

Thurs 26th – Day 1

Up at 5am and cycled about 25k to the start at Imber Court Sports Club through Richmond Park and Kingston. The start was chaotic with bikes and riders and kit flying left, right and centre! I’d packed my sunscreen and chamois creme in my bag the night before so did without them. Excited and nervous.

When Group 1 or the “Look at my ?2k Lightweights” group was called we waited a few minutes before a slow roll over to Hampton Court Palace for the official start (around 7am). I was thrilled to note the pace was very slow (for now) as we dealt with the traffic out of London.

When the pace picked up I was fine. I was really quite enjoying myself. The weather was nice. The pace was good. Sweet.

At one point I heard a crash occur behind me and we stopped. I used this stop to roll to the front of the bunch with fasteddy. We had a bit of a chat and then he rolled off. I hung around until I was passed by the bunch and settled back in to a fast rhythm. (I watched the mechanics replace the guy’s broken forks in about 10mins the next morning!)

There was another incident later as we were cranking along quite fast with a nice tail wind. A guy overlapped wheels and then one of the riders moved over. I don’t know how the overlapper hung onto his bike but he did and he stayed up and carried on. I was right behind this so.. clench and… phew!

Marcel was a guy I rode with in Group 2 during training and I encouraged him to start in G1 after I’d (accidentally) ridden with the G1 bunch and found it manageable. He did so and we had a chance to chat riding through the little bumps in between London and Dover. He’s only been riding since November but is very strong. I knew fasteddy was going to be fast (it’s in the name!) as I’d seen him go past me at a rate of knots during the Tour of Wessex. I think he ended up just outside the placings on each KOM (King of the Mountains) climb. Of course I was never anywhere near the front while these were going on! 🙂

We got lost at one point and had to do a u-turn down the hill we’d just climbed. Doh! Worse then unnecessary climbing is riding through puddles again when you’ve only just cleaned your bike properly for the first time ever! 😉

There was also a bit of a bunch mix-up at some point after this when we were passing Group 2. Just before the lunch break I was looking around and noted that I didn’t recognise anyone! Doh! I’d somehow joined Group 2. In the line up for lunch (lovely chicken, pasta and cake at a winery somewhere) I met a few other guys who were in G1 but found themselves mixed with G2. I think the front of G1 accelerated and the back didn’t see them go so stayed mixed with G2. Never mind, we only lost 10-15min and all regrouped at lunch anyway.

Some people went for massages whereas I was following Steve’s advice and moved straight into the line for food and a sit down meal.

Endurance mantra: Eat, drink, rest, eat, drink, rest, repeat!

After the lunch was the first KOM and there was much banter about who would contest it. People in teams were handing over bottles to team-mates and had skipped lunch and all manner of other tactics for this. I had no idea it was this serious! We were told it would regroup at the top so I let the whippets go for it and crawled up probably mid-bunch. Someone in front went down going up the hill! Very bizarre looking stack. He got back on and kept riding before I made it up to him anyway.

As planned we regrouped at the top and then proceeded to smash it towards Dover. It was great! Smooth roads (unheard of in England, I know!) with a good tailwind and cooperative bunch. It made for a great cycling experience.

Before the final KOM near Dover Emma Davies rode up the outside and towed me right up to second wheel behind her and Stephen Roche (one of only two riders ever to win the Giro d’talia, Tour de France and World Championships in a single year). I stayed here until the KOM and then just went backwards. 92kg is fine for riding on the flat or downhill but going up it becomes a serious disadvantage!

Another regrouping happened after this climb and then it was a 60kph+ ride into Dover, constantly watching the motorbike outriders motioning for us to slow down 🙂

My Day 1 claim to fame was arriving into the carpark at the finish first – fasteddy will verify! 🙂 In truth we got stuck behind a big Polish truck and I just happened to have been up the front. Winner! hehe 😛

We arrived around 2pm and spent some time unloading kit for the ferry trip – I’d not packed a change of clothes so remained in my Grupetto cycling kit. Note to self: put flip-flops (“thongs” for the Aussies) in my musette in future. The ferry was leaving at 3.15pm and we were ready and waiting (without showing my passport!) but it was running late so we chilled out for a while. I think we loaded up and left around 4pm, maybe later. Group 2 still hadn’t made it and they were supposed to join us! Whoops. They caught a later one at 6pm.

In Calais we rode off the ferry and left our bikes in a nearby warehouse? ready for the start. We were then bussed to our hotel ‘Holiday Inn Coquelles’.

Group 1’s perk here was getting showered and eating well before anyone else arrived. I think the other groups arrived quite late. I was wearing my SKINS as suggested by The Law. I can’t really comment if they make a big difference but they certainly make your legs feel better right after a ride. There’s much less of that nagging/aching/twitching feeling post-ride. I will continue to use them for bigger or multi-day rides.

All I’m interested in is a Powertap unit with freehub body NOT MADE OF CHEESE!

www.aboc.com.au – powertap upgrade

www.cyclingnews.com – saris powertap 2008

My L2P phone photos

Londres-Paris Event Galleries

Tom’s L2P photostream

Desi’s Londres-Paris photostream